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 Elisabetta Gregoraci still wearing a bikini, still digging that goldCategory: Other - Posted by: rapvirus on Jul 29th, 2008Here's some new bikini shots of Wonderbra model Elisabetta Gregoraci at Blue Beach with her husband Flavio Briatore. If anything, I hope these pictures will inspire you. You see, folks, with a little hard work and determination, anyone can grow up to... become a fat rich Italian guy who buys and sells models like they're baseball cards - with breasts. Dream big, everybody! |
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 Heidi Range requires security while wearing a bikiniCategory: Cinema & TV - Posted by: rapvirus on Jul 26th, 2008Here's British singer Heidi Range of Sugababes (I have no clue.) at Miami Beach with her sister Hayley. Apparently Heidi feels she needs constant security while wearing a bikini. That's pretty narcissistic of somebody I had to look up on Wikipedia an...d is rocking the Kim Kardashian sarong maneuver. I mean, really, nobody needs a bodyguard while they're at the beach. Except me and because of the jellyfish. |
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 Sophie Monk in a bikiniCategory: Cinema & TV - Posted by: rapvirus on Jul 24th, 2008These pics tell an incredible story. A story about Sophie Monk in a bikini. Then in a wetsuit. Then stripping out of that wetsuit while taking a shower and now she's just in a bikini. It's basically The Greatest Story Ever Told, and I'll fight to the... death anyone that says otherwise. UPDATE: Even God agrees. Check out this e-mail: The Superficial, That shit straight PWNED The Bible. Ha, what was I thinking with the plagues and talking donkeys? If you want to tell a story and tell it right, you use bikinis. I'll remember that next time for "The Bible 2: Now with More Lightsaber Fights." |
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 Gabrielle Reece is still hot, also wearing a bikiniCategory: Sports - Posted by: rapvirus on Jul 23rd, 2008Sports model Gabrielle Reece is seen here vacationing in St. Tropez, France with husband surf guru Laird John Hamilton. I can tell Gabrielle just had a baby - and not because she's holding one. (Okay, that helped.) In the meantime, ladies, if you wan...t an idea of what I like look like, I'm built exactly like Laird here. Except more buff and Tiffany jewelry shoots out of my pecs. |
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 Audrina Patridge is Bikini BlackCategory: Cinema & TV - Posted by: rapvirus on Jul 22nd, 2008The Hills star Audrina Patridge sports a cute black and pink bikini as she takes in a few rays in the pool at the DKNY Jeans Malibu beach house in Malibu, Calif., on Saturday. Bikini by Birdie Jo. Over the weekend, Audrina, 23, did what she knows b...est — she got paid $5,000 an hour to go clubbing, drinking and taking pictures with fans! 10+ pictures of Audrina Patridge in bikini black… |
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 Ana Obregón in a bikini = David Beckham hit thatCategory: Cinema & TV - Posted by: rapvirus on Jul 22nd, 2008Spanish actress Ana Obregón hit the beach in Miami and it looks like she's joined by Jack from Will & Grace. (Okay, not really.) David Beckham allegedly tapped Ana's 56-year-old ass which earned her the nickname "Geriatric Barbie" from Victoria Beck...ham. Now before you say "Awww yeah" take a closer look. Once you finish chasing your eyes around the room, keep in mind David got with Ana back in 2005, so maybe time has been really, really cruel to her. In fact, some might say time pushed Ana down an elevator shaft then tossed in a grenade. Just for kicks. |
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 Cindy Taylor in a bikini = Hmm, I think she's a modelCategory: Other - Posted by: rapvirus on Jul 22nd, 2008Here are pics of model/actress Cindy Taylor (Burn Notice) at the Ed Hardy 2009 Swimwear fashion show. I thought we could all use something to cleanse our palates after the Khloe Kardashian post. Hopefully, these work for you guys, because I'm heavily... contemplating shoving a belt sander in my mouth. |
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 Rosario Dawson hosing herself off in a bikiniCategory: Cinema & TV - Posted by: rapvirus on Jul 20th, 2008Rosario Dawson in a bikini holding a garden hose. I can't think of a better summertime memory. It kind of reminds me of that sweltering August when I opened a "Lemonade and Lap Dance" stand. I was doing pretty well until the cops shut me down. To thi...s day I still believe my mom tipped them off after dad came home smelling like Country Time and skeez. Too bad they couldn't arrest an eight-year-old. But they could send me to military school after giving my Nintendo to orphans while I cried in the back seat of the station wagon. Where was I going with this? Oh, yeah, Rosario Dawson is awkwardly hot. |
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 Claire Danes & Hugh Dancy Soak In The SunCategory: Cinema & TV - Posted by: rapvirus on Jul 19th, 2008Claire Danes and British actor boyfriend Hugh Dancy continue working on their tan on Friday in Ischia, an Italian island in the bay of Naples. (Claire’s teeny weensy red bikini caused quite the stir earlier this week.) Danes, 29, and Dancy, 33, ...are in town for the Ischia Global Film and Music Fest just like Terrence Howard, Rosario Dawson and her boyfriend Mathieu Schreyer. 15+ pictures inside of Claire Danes and Hugh Dancy soaking in the sun… |
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 Rosario Dawson & DJ French Have Fun in the SunCategory: Cinema & TV - Posted by: rapvirus on Jul 19th, 2008Bikini babe Rosario Dawson looks stunning in her red-trimmed black bikini on Friday while vacationing with boyfriend Mathieu Schreyer in Ischia, an Italian island in the bay of Naples. Dawson, 29, and Schreyer, aka DJ Mr. French, have been togethe...r since January. The couple is in town for the Ischia Global Film and Music Fest. Also in town for the Ischia Fest: Claire Danes and British boyfriend Hugh Dancy, as well as Terrence Howard. 10+ pictures inside of Rosario Dawson sunbathing with DJ French… |
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 Nereida Gallardo in a Bikini ReduxCategory: Cinema & TV - Posted by: rapvirus on Jul 17th, 2008The ass-tabulous Nereida Gallardo was all smiles after being dumped this week by soccer stud Cristiano Ronaldo, apparently comforted by the gentle hands of a woman bearing tanning oil. You can’t go wrong with a good rubdown from a some slut in a bi...kini. It’s a sure fix. Definitely a step up from the “pat-down by an arresting officer and a cavity search in the drunk tank” route I usually take. A lot less pepper spray, too. |
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 Dame Helen Mirren in a BikiniCategory: Cinema & TV - Posted by: rapvirus on Jul 17th, 2008The Daily Mail has pictures of Dame Helen Mirren bikini-ing it up in the south of Italy this week, and I’m only left with two words: god damn. Helen Mirren is 62 years old. 62! Never has the term “dame” been so appropriate. Or the term “geria...tric fetish site,” for that matter. Maybe you should swing by HotHornyGrannys.com or SeniorSluts.org when you’re finished here. Just a suggestion. Pervert. |
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 Scariest Uma Thurman Bikini Pictures Ever!Category: Cinema & TV - Posted by: rapvirus on Jul 16th, 2008Oh. My. God. I have no idea what's going on these Uma Thurman bikini pictures, but that's just about the scariest thing I've ever seen. Someone call Sigourney Weaver, or the Ghostbusters, or something, because I don't want to be around when whatever ...it is that's inside Uma Thurman's belly erupts in an evil gelatenous ooze to try and take over our planet. Or is she just pregnant? Either way, that shit's nasty. |
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 Brooke Hogan in a bikini = Please, stop confusing my pants for the love of GodCategory: Cinema & TV - Posted by: rapvirus on Jul 15th, 2008Apparently, performing in lingerie wasn't enough for Brooke Hogan. No, she had to continue her promotional tour of cleavage and get her bikini on today with Hulk's girlfriend Jennifer McDaniel. You know, the one that looks just like Brooke but add 40... years. Anyway, I was almost mesmerized by these pics of Brooke pouring water down her silicone pillows until I came across this shot from behind. Now I know what prison looks like. I'll be good! |
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 Michelle Hunziker Bikini PicturesCategory: Other - Posted by: rapvirus on Jul 15th, 2008Michelle Hunziker is a Swiss model and actress who’s married to Italian singer Eros Ramazzotti, and — per the summer supererogative standard — in a bikini. She’s also sporting two extra nipples on her chest there. By 15th century standards, s...he’s obviously a witch. She could suckle a demon and one of the demon’s old college buddies and still have two teats to spare. But the only way to know for sure if someone’s a witch is to find out if she’s made of wood and weighs the same as a duck. You don’t get wise in the ways of science without knowing a little bit about the scientific method, you know. |
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 Celine Dion Bikini Pictures Are a ProblemCategory: Music Industry - Posted by: rapvirus on Jul 14th, 2008Okay, this celebrity bikini picture shit is getting out of hand. I know it's what this site is basically about, but I swore to myself I'd never do a Celine Dion post, but not only am I doing a Celine Dion post, I'm doing a fucking Celine Dion bikini ...pictures post. If that's not a sign that I've got a problem, I don't know what is. I'll be checking into celebrity bikini rehab today. I just pray they don't have Internet, because I can't stop myself. |
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 Eva Longoria Pregnant in a Bikini?Category: Cinema & TV - Posted by: rapvirus on Jul 12th, 2008These pictures of Eva Longoria on vacation in Portofino took the gossip world by storm today, and “by storm” I mean “she looks fat.” Not that there’s anything wrong with being fat, necessarily. Just like there’s not anything wrong about h...aving a lazy eye or psoriasis that thing where your head grows three time its normal size and shit oozes out of your ears. People like that can still live happy, fulfilling lives. They just need to live them somewhere far away underground in a sewer drain, where their fat ugly skin diseases and uncontrollable gas and ear secretions can’t infect the rest of us beautiful people. It’s what Darwin would have wanted. |
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 Carrie Underwood in Shitty Bikini Pictures of the DayCategory: Cinema & TV - Posted by: rapvirus on Jul 12th, 2008If you are wonder what shit shoveling, tobacco chewin’, guitar strummin’, whiskey drinking cowboys who suffer from a broken heart and who’s dog died last month jerk off to while they cry, Carrie Underwood is it. Here she is in a bikini, which w...ould help those fuckers reach orgasms if they knew how to turn on a computer, but are too busy herding cattle instead, but at least they have their old transmittor radio to learn every lyric of her heart warming songs. The truth is that Carrie Underwood shows us that American Idol can make you very fucking rich, if you use it to get into country music, because country fans are loyal as fuck and will always support one of their own for their entire career, making Underwood a cash cow you’d want to saddle up and ride into the sunset. |
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 Adele Silva And Verity Rushworth Bikini PicturesCategory: Cinema & TV - Posted by: rapvirus on Jul 11th, 2008Adele Silva and Verity Rushworth hit the Dubai beach in teeny-tiny bikinis yesterday, and if you — like me — didn’t know who Adele Silva or Verity Rushworth were, I IMDB’d them to find out a little more: Adele Silva and Verity Rusworth... are English actresses who are hot and wearing bikinis, and you’re totally gay for looking this up. Fag. Bottom line, if you’re still reading this, you should go ahead and cash out your heterosexual card, because you’re a gay. Fact. |
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 Kate Moss Bikini PicturesCategory: Other - Posted by: rapvirus on Jul 11th, 2008Obviously it’s summertime and celebrities everywhere are taking time off from there hectic, stressful celebrity lives to relax at their beach houses or on the yachts of various rich douche friends. So with Kate Moss being a supermodel I’m sure sh...e’s got plenty of rich male friends in her entourage who would be pleased to have her lounging on their yacht in her bikini. I’m a celebrity blogger and have a garbage bag filled with tap water on the roof of my apartment building so anytime she wants to come over I’ll chill some wine coolers. Let me know. |
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